Evil...ARE YOU WINNING?

The Greatest Gift You Can Give

If there is to be change in the world.

In Retrospect

Because Words Carry A Vibration...VERBAL AND WRITTEN - DRAFT

Those who are verbal abusers chronically see themselves as victims. 

 

****Their sense of themselves as victims is deeply entrenched and feel that their time invested in this relationship needs self radification****

 

They may feel “the victim” of many many things, including being inconvenienced, or their needs not met.  It is from their self-engendered victim-status that blame flows so naturally; from blame, the anger/rage; from the anger/rage, the rationalization of aggressive/abusive responses. They put it all back on you.

 

 

It’s also the case that once abusive individuals have established a pattern of their self-perceived victimization, their threshold for feeling subsequently victimized decreases; now, it takes less and less for them to feel victimized, perhaps only a minor disappointment or frustration. As time goes on, it becomes VERY EVIDENT AND DEFINED.

 

This is why many abusive individuals can find almost any basis to complain, to feel slighted, thereby tripping (and licensing) their abusiveness. 

 

Abusive individuals, at bottom, feel entitled not to be burdened by whatever feels burdensome to them. It is your job, your responsibility, to alleviate their burden.

 

• Respond to texts on demand (not responding or not responding fast enough to their satisfaction)

> attempt to demand contact from you, typically using a manipulative way to do this so you will respond, usually with sympathy or urgency.

 

And when you don't respond...WITHHOLDING, THREATS AND PERCEIVED ASSUMPTIONS AND DEMEANING HURTFUL, SARCASTIC WORDS WILL COME AS THE RESPONSE.


 

 

Your failure to do so, from their self-centered perspective, is an abdication of your duty, a form of betrayal. There are also threats to non-response, or ways in which they demean you verbally, in a text or on social media.

 

 

 

 

 

Not surprisingly, many abusive individuals tend to think in paranoid and problematically rigid ways.






INSECURITIES - ASSUMPTIONS

ASSUMPTIONS OF INSECURITY
 

They tend to RIDGIDLY ATTRIBUTE MALICE to those who disappoint them, OR ACTUALLY POINT OUT WHAT IT IS THEY ARE DOING OR BEING.

ACCUSATION BASED ON JEALOUS ASSUMPTIONS OF INSECURITY
 

 

 

Deploying spectacular powers of rationalization and projection, they see themselves ironically (and, of course, conveniently) habitually as victim—as the betrayed, exploited party—a warped perception that ratchets up their anger, lubricating their impending abusive response.  

 

 

Sometimes underlying abandonment issues (including borderline personality disorder) fuel the possessive/controlling behaviors of abusive individuals.
 

TRUST - A new way to see it

If we are wanting to change the world, we must UNLEARN what we have been taught, told and believe to be truth.

Trust is one thing that has been misconstrued in definition for so many reasons. It is a demand upon another to meet an expectation. In setting expectations from a person up front, you are in turn placing a need for yourself upon another.

Consider a new way to remove judgment, expectation and personal needs from relationships - whether it be friends, family, significant others or spouses with this quote from Neal Donald Walsch:

...that trust is not necessary when you don't want or
need anything.

If you are wondering whether you can "trust" someone,
look closely at what it is you think you need or want
from them. When you need or want nothing, trust is
not an issue.

And, of course, there is nothing that you do need,
from anybody, given Who and What You Are. You
are an expression of Divinity Itself, and Divinity is
your Source.

Thinking that you "need" anything, given that this is so,
would be nothing more than a misunderstanding.

There is too much "poor me" "what about me" "what can you do for me" expectations from others close to you, that are constantly on demand to be fulfilled. And because it becomes a defined NEED and expectation from someone else, when another person "fails" to meet this obligation requirement, it can cause negative emotions as a projection onto the other person, even end a relationship, due to a need not met. Seems very limited and restricting, right?

Trust that failed when defined can consist of many scenarios. Then we begin to judge by comparing it to other things that cause mistrust and how BADLY it rates as a projection of wrongdoing based on our societal perceptions. The thing that caused the perceived lack of trust then becomes judged. This is how we determine how we will treat the other person;  based on the severity of this perception.

Failed trust is also handled differently for every person in their life as well. Trust defined as one thing for a spouse can mean another version and expectation they need from their child.

If their child continually lies when confronted, and repeats the pattern over and over, with consequences, but the child continues to lie about stealing, things they did or did not do, etc...does the parent to end the relationship with the child?

They are a child, they say. They are learning. Are we still not learning even as adults? Everyday? We are still growing and becoming as individuals SEPARATE from our relationships.

YES WE ARE.

To end a relationship solely based on a lack of trust from another is giving up because  someone "failed" to meet your expectations. This in turn limits you to TRUST again. Limits you to receiving the compassion and gifts from the whole person you let go who did not meet this one expectation. How limiting is this reasoning? Remember, YOU (or societies perception) of the mis-trust has now defined and ruled the outcome.

The illusions we create only in our mind can leave us in the illusion, or allow us the freedom of compassion and love again. It is a choice. But only for those willing to give up their old beliefs and standards, which no longer serve if we are to evolve to a higher place of self.

I AM Peace. I AM Joy. I AM LOVE. I AM NOW THE LIGHT.

February 26 2015

TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY. OF A NEW BEGINNING. TO TRANSFORM THE EGO AS I'VE FOUND MY TRUE SELF. MY EXPERIENCE HERE HAS BEEN MISLED BY MY FALSE SELF - THE EGO, AND THE PERCEPTION IT HAD OF WHAT LOVE IS.

WHAT I FELT AND EXPRESSED AS LOVE TOWARDS OTHERS WAS DEEP, MEANINGFUL, AND FULLY PRESENT. WHAT I FELT AS LOVE DISPLAYED BY SOULS DISGUISED BY THEIR NARCISSISTIC EGO FALSE SELF WAS NOTHING CLOSE TO THAT. BUT IT WAS ALL I KNEW, SO I ACCEPTED IT. ALL THIS TIME, I WAS HURT BY THE HARDSHIP THAT I WAS TRICKED BY THEIR FALSE EGO, AND NEVER GOT REALLY FEEL NOR TO SEE WHO THE TRUE SELF THAT WAS LOST INSIDE.

I BELIEVED THEIR BEHAVIOR TOWARDS ME, ALTHOUGH PAINFUL, TO BE LOVE. IN SEEKING IT SO DESPERATELY  - I BELIEVED THAT IN ORDER TO EXPERIENCE LOVE, AND NOT THE LOSS OF BEING LOVED, THAT HOW I ALLOWED MYSELF TO BE TREATED MUST BE NOT SO BAD, I MUST CONTINUE TO ALLOW IN ORDER TO NOT FEEL LOSS OF THE ONLY TYPE OF LOVE I KNEW HOW TO HOLD ONTO. 

THERE CAME A DEFINITE TIME IN EACH EXPERIENCE WHERE I KNEW IN MY HEART INTUITIVELY THAT THIS WAS WRONG IN SOME WAY, BUT HAD LONG FORGOTTEN HOW TO SEEK  THIS LOVE, ALONG WITH JOY AND PEACE WITHIN MYSELF,  FOR I ALWAYS BELIEVED IT HAD TO COME FROM THE OUTSIDE AND BE GIVEN TO ME. AS IF TO BE EARNED.

THIS IS HOW I EXPERIENCED LOVE IN AN EGO STATE. LETTING GO OF THE FEAR OF LOSING THIS LOVE WAS HARD. TO REMOVE THAT THOUGHT MEANT TO REMOVE THE EGO FULL OF FEAR, RESENTMENTS AND PAIN. IT ALSO LEAD ME TO THE HARSH REALITY THAT MY EGO'S THINKING IN THIS MANNER **ALLOWED THESE EXPERIENCES TO CONTINUE***. FROM VICTIM OF PAIN BROUGHT UPON ME, TO THE REALIZATION THAT I ALLOWED IT, BECAME THE TURNING POINT IN SEARCH OF MY TRUE SELF.

I REALIZED THAT LOVE CANNOT BE WITHHELD, IT CANNOT BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU, LOVE CANNOT BE MANIPULATED, IT KNOWING ONLY A STATE OF INFINITE BLISS.  I HAD NOW ADDED GUILT UPON MYSELF, GUILT FOR NOT KNOWING LOVE'S TRUE MEANING, AND BELIEVING IT WAS NOT THOSE THINGS AT ALL. BETRAYAL TO MYSELF. AT THAT POINT, I HAD NO IDEA WHO I WAS. SO HOW WAS I TO PULL MYSELF AWAY FROM THE FALSE SELF BACK ON MY JOURNEY?

THE WHAT YOU KNOW JUST BECAUSE YOU KNOW WAS DORMANT. TAKING ACTION WAS LIKE SWITCHING ON A LIGHT. MOVED ME TO A STATE OF AWARENESS TO INTUITIVELY KNOW THE NEXT STEP. AFTER SO LONG BEING STUCK IN A LOST PLACE ON MY PATH.

ONCE I RECEIVED THE VALIDATION OF AND UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT I WENT THROUGH, I REALIZED HOW IMOERTANT IT ALL WAS IN ORDER TO BRING ME BACK TO THE SOURCE. SIMPLY LETTING GO OF ANY NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - BITTERNESS, HATRED, RESENTMENTS YOU HAVE FOR THOSE INDIVIDUALS IN THOSE EXPERIENCES THAT  YOU BELIEVED CAUSED YOU HARM, AND LETTING GO OF THE GUILT AND PAIN YOU CARRY IN CONDEMNING YOURSELF FOR SIMPLY WAKING UP!! THE TRUE SELF AWAKENED WITHIN TO LET ME SEE THAT IT HAD THE FALSE EGO SELF WORK AND TRICK YOU INTO ALLOWING YOU TO HAVE THOSE UNPLEASANT EXPERIENCES. BUT DID IT?


AND THAT'S WHEN I REALIZED HOW SIMPLE IT WAS TO GET UNSTUCK AND BACK ON MY PATH...REALIZE THAT EVERYTHING UP UNTIL THIS POINT IS WHERE IT IS TO BE. ACCEPT THIS, AND....


1. ACCEPT THE LESSONS THAT THE FALSE EGO PUT IN MY PATH TO EXPERIENCE!!!

 2.HAVE GRATITUDE FOR THOSE EXPERIENCES!

 3. OFFER FORGIVENESS TO MYSELF AND THOSE WHO I HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR TAKING PART IN THOSE EXPERIENCES!!!


                      FEELING OF PURE PEACE IN MY HEART.OMMMMMM....

I PUT TRUST IN KNOWING IF I LET GO -  TODAY - I ALLOW MYSELF TO OPEN UP TO EXPERIENCING ANYTHING I DESIRE. IT GUIDED ME BACK TO THE PATH OF BECOMING TO WHO I REALLY AM. THE BEST GIFT OF ALL.

I HAVE GREAT THINGS TO ACHIEVE AND IT IS TIME TO GET TO WORK. I KNOW THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT ARE WAITING FOR MY GUIDANCE AND COUNSEL. HELPING OTHERS. IT IS TIME.

I KNOW THAT LOVE KNOWS NO BOUNDARIES AND IS UNCONDITIONAL AND HERE WITHIN ME, ALWAYS.  I SEE ALL OTHERS AND RESPECT THEIR JOURNEYS, FOR WE ARE ALL ON OUR OWN PATHS THAT WILL  LEAD US ALL BACK FROM INDIVIDUALS TO ONENESS AS EACH SOUL MOVES THROUGH THEIR EXPERIENCES AND BACK TO THEIR TRUE SELF.

 I AM GRATEFUL FOR THE AWAKENING TO MY PURPOSE HERE. IT IS CLEAR THAT I AM NOW GUIDED TO BECOME THE  HUMANITARIAN I WAS MEANT TO BE ALL ALONG. I HAVE BEEN GUIDED TO THE TASK AT HAND.

AS I MOVE FORWARD TODAY,  I FREE MYSELF FROM THE EGO THAT CARRIED HEAVY GUILT AND PAIN FOR ENABLING AND ALLOWING MYSELF TO EXPERIENCE THESE THINGS, FOR THEY WERE MEANT FOR ME AND MY JOURNEY ALL ALONG. 

               I SAY WITH GRATITIUDE TODAY, FEBRUARY 6, 2015, THIS AFFIRMATION:

I ASK THE SOURCE TODAY TO GUIDE MY WORDS ALL TO THOSE WHO WERE PUT ALONG MY PATH TO EDUCATE ME. TODAY I GIVE THEM THANKS.  PROVIDE GRATITUDE FOR THEIR PRESENCE ALONG MY PATH FOR WHAT I HAVE LEARNED.  I ASK THAT THE SOURCE ENERGY FIND THESE SOULS TODAY. OPEN THEIR CROWN CHAKRAS AND DIRECT THE WHITE LIGHT AND LOVE INTO THEIR SOULS. AT THIS TIME  MAY THEY FEEL MY WORDS OF FORGIVENESS AND GRATITUDE. PLEASE GUIDE THEIR THOUGHTS TO RESONATE IN THE STATE OF NOW. SHOW THEM THEIR GIFT OF LIVING IN THE MOMENT. TO JUST BE. LET THEM FEEL THE  BEAUTY AND JOY, PEACE AND LOVE THEY HAVE HAD WITHIN THEM ALL ALONG.  LET THEM SEE LOVE PEACE AND JOY AROUND THEM AS THEY'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED IT BEFORE.  MAY THEY NOW SEE THIS IN ALL THOSE THEY ARE IN CONTACT WITH AS WELL.

THIS STATE OF BEING IS AT IS ALL THERE IS. WITH THIS AFFIRMATION I PUT IT OUT INTO TO THE UNIVERSE TO MANIFEST WITH LOVE.

                                                     SO IT SHALL BE.

 

EGO and it's Traps!

This is what we call the traps of the Ego

It will lie, push, demand, defend, attack, compete, protect, constrain, yell, and dramatize, as far as it can go, so as to keep up this ongoing game of sustaining the main illusion of control.

The greatest joke of all is that the Ego makes a fool of itself!  As it is oriented towards the outside world, the Ego won´t take responsibility for itself, tending to judge and blame the outside world for its results.  It is very worthwhile to take not that we don´t see things as they are, we see them as WE are. The great illusion being that happiness, or connecting to God, is something you search for on the outside, is merely a notion that comes from the Ego.

On a collective level, the sum of Egos builds up a conditioned and rigid society whose individuals are confined to determined ways of behaving, resulting in a world of black and white, good and bad, a consensus of “normality” and what is expected of each one. There is no room for spontaneity, authenticity and creativity, because this defies the old rigid ways of the Ego,  and so we learn to compromise our inner truth from the very beginning. And every time the illusion is cracked open, it is hurtful for the Ego – but the Ego is NOT the true self!

The process by which the Ego arrives at a False Self instead of a Real Self is a matter of a whole new article; however, it is central to understand how this vehicle can be oriented to fulfill one way or another. The Ego, which is an essential quality of the human being, is prone to support either the negative sides of yourself or the positive ones.